Solo track : Hear me say [When frustrations turn into rhyme]

** R.I.S Unofficial Track**

A track made a few days ago. Most efforts went to the verses, couldn't make much of the chorus though.

Link to the song

http://www.4shared.com/file/157340780/f05bcc5a/Hear_me_say.html


Click.listen.enjoy :-)

Lyrics:

HEAR ME SAY

Intro : Yeah .... all I gotta say is...
I screwed up, and I let everyone down
And for that I'm sorry GOD
It's my fault, so juss.... leave them out of it
Punish me the way you wish...yeah....listen..

Verse__1

All my life
I kept my rights
So tight
Kept all the lust for powder and pills, all aside

My circle at the streets
Watchin for each other and stayin discreet
Always fly, we succeed
With the weed
Still can't believe

How my mind got so hazy
Leading us all into something so fucking crazy
Slippin from my position, I was thinkin maybe
Lets try this new shit, I nick-named it Daizy
Then we

Over-dozed ourselves
Lost ourselves
As if this shit was controllin us, broke our shelves
Lockin the real us in some kinda unbreakable shells
The next thing all I remember is nothing, lets just say we scewed up and fucked ourselves

The next morning I wake up
Remembering nothing I Shake up

My neighbours, gaurds, mommy and daddy all staring at me
What the fuck is wrong? Suddenly my memory started to bleed
Last night it wasn't me

______________________________________________________________________________________

Chorus__(1X)

As you hear me, these are frustations turned into rhymes
Come near me, you'll see me walk aside
Isolated is how I hide

Standing alone I can only be hoping
Myself can I ever be controlling

Questions that can never be ansered
Yet, knowing this, with drugs, myself I showered

______________________________________________________________________________________

Verse__2

The next day comes on
As if I've been Conned
Bringin this prison on myself, GOD says: "you're On"
Hatin myself, I regret the very day I was born
Every light through my eyes, It's brightness gone

In my memory I can see a wound that bleeds
Only flashes everynight, thats all I see
Within these indoor walls, I sit concieved
Everyday makin me feel like I got some mental disease

A silent stone in his prison
Filled with haunting visions
No move he can make, lushed, full of hesitations
I aint makin no complains about my situation
I got what I deserve for my fucked up actions

The reflection on the mirror, I can no more recognize
A soulless wreck, looks like needs to be crucified
Take a gun, cock it and blow it in the head, right inside
Even thats a better deal then being buried alive
____________________________________________________________________________________

Chorus__(1X)

As you hear me, these are frustations turned into rhymes
Come near me, you'll see me walk aside
Isolated is how I hide

Standing alone I can only be hoping
Myself can I ever be controlling

Questions that can never be ansered
Yet, knowing this, with drugs, myself I showered
____________________________________________________________________________________

Verse_3

Almost been a month, since I wrote those two verses
Getting all the rhymes and words along with the curses

I guess I stumbled again
In my ears, pills mumbled again
Myself once again
I failed to defend

Black as coal
Inside and I know
Day by day I seem to be loosing my self-control

Expect the worst from me with all these daizies in my blood
From my brain into my nerves, is the nightmare flood

Everynight its me entangling in my bedsheets
With the flashbacks, my mind struggles to bear the heat
The walls seems to be sqeezin in, or maybe its just me
Burning thoughts scorching my nerves from the head to feet

Its what I feel everytime I get over-dozed
Now it seems every now and then, hells never been so close

Now its clear
In me seems to be a corrupted flare
Frustation makes nothin fair
Back with the valium pills I go and share
__________________________________________________________________________________

Chorus__(1X)

As you hear me, these are frustations turned into rhymes
Come near me, you'll see me walk aside
Isolated is how I hide

Standing alone I can only be hoping
Myself can I ever be controlling

Questions that can never be ansered
Yet, knowing this, with drugs, myself I showered


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gud track..nd gud improvement (y)

I liked this trak... speciall the lyrics.... nice work bro.....

uve to be a lot more clear w/ ur spittin'. u got the rite amount of emotions..delivery needs to improve. if u can get ur emotions, flow, and delivery together in this track..it cud hv been a HOTT track. but not that bad nonetheless.
keep up the lyrics...write this sorta stuff and u'll get my support all the way. But one thing, u gotta learn abt those technical details abt lyrics and syllables and all..that'll automatically improve ur flow/style.

thanx all
Totally get wathcu sayin AK, and appreciate a lot. i cant disagree wid u, the trak sounds very rough ...
I'll keep the words u said echoed in my ears to see wat i can do latr

haha dope shit dost..
yu cud've given this to rh to mix thou!

Relay cul

thans asif and mishkatrocks !

and ya Asif ur right... didn't really expect much frm this song :p

and yu bych stop releasing tracks before tellin us faggot

duuude.........u got spectacular lyrix and wit a little work u wud get a killer flow......
4.5/5

GUD
Shadow Text generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com

Copy that asif :p lol sorry

Demonic thanx a lot man... all this was relee very unexpected, i'll make sure i put more time to all my other works.. DAMn the lazy me!

LoL mishka, thanx again xD

wow! u hav som skills boy ;P
da lyriks is amazin. da song wud'v bin a blst if u had a prof mixer.
do u hv mor trks?

lykd ithh broda !! :xD

Glad u did Tanzil, given the fact that the song has a lot of prob in mixing and delivery

@Anika, Ya I do have other songs, but been a long time since I stopped lettin em out. Tell you what, i have one mixed down, a very old one. I'll post it in the audio section. Check it out if u're interested.

Link:

http://deshirhymes.virtuaboard.com/spittin-on-mics-audio-section-f6/valium-me-solo-track-t4075.htm#99756

pretty good track man. i liked the lyrics quite a bit... you rushed the flow at a few places but thats cool. with more practice you can overcome that and also improve your mic presence. keep it real.